Speechless

With Anita

When I woke up this morning, I didn't think I'd be going through one of the most unforgettable moments in my life.

Yesterday we had a mini meeting with the director of the foundation, Galo, as well as with the teachers Carmen and Narcisa, and all four of us volunteers.  Galo talked about the foundation and then wanted to touch base with us as far as what we thought.  He wanted us to give our insight on everything.

I told him we'd noticed how the kids, not all of them, do behave bad.  They need to learn more about values and why they're important.  Games are for fun, so why are some of these kids cheating?  Friends are for having good times and to be there for each other, so why are some of these kids picking on each other?  I mentioned it would be a good idea to share with us what each kid is going through, what their home situation is like.  Narcisa said we could even visit their homes and talk to the parents, or parent, if we wanted to.

Well I wasn't expecting to go to anyone's home today, but that's what happened.  As I explained to my host mom and Yonseili last night, I was scared to not know how to respond, scared to see how these kids are living, where they're sleeping.  I had to mentally and emotionally prepare myself in a few minutes, I said a little prayer.  Thank God Carmen was going with me.  Yonseili stayed in class with the kids.

Marlon, Henry, Daniel, Joan

We went to Henry's, Viviana's, and Maria Jose's property.  We went into Henry's and Viviana's house.  Carmen knocked for a while before a young guy answered the door and then she asked for the mom.  She came to the door and I immediately thought Viviana looked like her a lot.  Carmen told her we just wanted to talk to her and told her I just wanted to see where the kids lived. After she hesitated because she said the house wasn't all clean, I told her she can let us in only if it's okay, no pressure.  But Carmen then kind of insisted.
So we went inside and to the right there were two little chicken coops, and I saw a few eggs inside.  There was one building, kind of like a shack, and that's where Maria Jose lives with her grandma.  We walked behind it and went inside Henry's house.  Inside was the lady's brother-in-law who was in town or something like that for a few days.  The house was a bit cluttered, but it did seem like the mom did the best she could to keep it somewhat together.  The kitchen was to the right and there was a dining table.  There were two couches close to the table, so it was a kitchen/dining room/living room.  On the left there were simple stairs.  The house was built by the dad who, if I understood correctly, is a construction worker.  It was kind of cold.  Carmen and I sat on one couch, the mom on the other, and the brother-in-law in the table.  He stayed quiet the entire time and maybe said a few words here and there when we walked upstairs to see the rest of the house.  We saw the rest of the house because Carmen asked if we could so that I could see.  Again, I only wanted to go up if the lady was okay with it, and she was.  There were two rooms upstairs.  In one, there was a double size bed cramped in there next to shelves and a television, which is where the parents sleep.  Next to that room is the childrens' room.  There was a bunk bed.  Tatiana, the older girl about 15 years old, sleeps in the bottom and Viviana and Henry sleep on the top one.  Henry is supposed to be sleeping in the room on the third floor, but does not want to.  When I saw the room upstairs I saw why.  Yeah, there was a bed and windows, but he'd be sleeping by himself and he'd probably get very cold.  I would be scared to sleep up there, so I can see why he wouldn't want to sleep up there.  Upstairs there was that room which the dad uses to put tools in as well as the manual 'washer.'  The mom had clothes up drying.
The home was the least of my concerns after everything the lady shared with us.  There was plenty that she said, well Carmen did ask a lot of questions.  It was more of an interrogation.  And although it was good to know all of that, it bothered me the way Carmen asked things.  But, anyway.  Other than the maybe two questions I made her, and the comments I had about her son, I was quiet the entire time.  We were there about 1/2 an hour, but let me tell you, it seemed like way longer.
She talked about how there was domestic violence-I'm sure there still is.  She talked about the domestic violence as if normal.  I would have expected to see someone get emotional, a bit teary-eyed, when talking about this, but she didn't.  It just makes me wonder if she's completely over it and she's strong... or if she really thinks it's 'normal.'  I'm thinking she sees it as normal, as painful as it may be.  My host mom shared with me that women, indigenous women, let themselves be hit by their husband.  Even if someone tried to help them, as apparently some people have, the indigenous women will not want help.  The reason? Husbands have the right to hit them.

There is a lot of machismo in this country, a lot of alcoholism, a lot of fanatics for soccer (Liga to be specific), a lot of poverty.  Seems like at least two of these are what's prohibiting the possibility of having a good core in families.

...

I thanked the lady.  I told her kids need love, affection, attention.  I let her know that although Henry is a handful, he is smart and has a lot of potential.  I would have expected a mom to say thank you and/or to say she knows... but she was kind of blushing as if she'd never received any compliment in her life... or, I don't know.  As soon as we stepped out of the property I just let it all out.  I just wish Carmen wouldn't have seen me.

In class Henry and Viviana asked why we had gone.  I simply told them I wanted to get to know everyone's families.  I told Henry his mom was pretty... he smiled and blushed... it was a great compliment to him.  He really loves his mom.  The rest of the day Henry was acting a bit quieter, a little more behaved.

Watching a Justin Bieber music video

Anita and Maria Jose dancing

At 11am we had the dance class like last week.  Toward the end Yonseili tried to hype things up a bit by choosing a song that everyone can dance to, but the kids didn't want to dance with us.   Al-righty.

We went to school to talk to Paty regarding our final presentation.  To get there we took a taxi.  We includes Florentina and Natacha.  I sat in the front seat and had the longest ride of my life.  The taxi driver must have worked for a travel agency before because he just kept talking and talking and talking to me about Ecuador and bla bla blah.  He kept saying, "Si niña linda..."  I just wanted to get out and run away from him.

Yonseili and I had been stressing about this final presentation for the longest time but it ended today.  Although our tutors said we couldn't do so, Paty assured us we could talk about anything we wanted... even personal things, as long as it wasn't a controversial topic.  Apparently one student talked about gays once, and there was a gay student in the audience.  It did not end well.  Yonseili will talk about New Mexico, I will talk about my experience here overall.  They simply want us to have fun presenting and to make sure we feel good about the topic so that it comes out naturally with emotions and excitement.  Then we came home to eat and after that I slept.

The rest of the evening was routine. =)

Highlight of the day:  The insight I got of more than just one house, not sure if to call it a home.